February 2012
school tomorrow.
Most people: Aw, look at the couple. They're so cute!
Me: I wonder if they've fucked yet.
The awkward moment when you have to use the...
Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: I'm late?
Teacher: You just missed an entire period..
Student: Are you telling me I'm pregnant?
me: I should go shower now
(five minutes later)
(another five minutes later)
(yet another five minutes later)
(more five minute intervals)
someone: (goes into the bathroom)
me: wow fuck you I was JUST about to go take a shower
bases for normal people:
1st: kissing
2nd: touching
3rd: oral
home run: sex
bases for me:
1st: knowing each other's existence
2nd: breathing the same air
3rd: eye contact
home run: speaking to each other
what if the secret of the universe is in the terms...
Snuggie commercials always make my day
-makemesmile:
Watchpussycat dolls- don’t cha
